Why can’t boys play with dolls?
I don’t quite understand what is wrong with the idea of my boys playing with a doll or a baby stroller or kitchen items.
As a child, I hated pink and didn’t want to play with dolls or makeup or anything girly. I played rugby and cricket with my cousins. I played marbles, cars and loved my Lego’s. SO what? I turned out fine. I am still not very girly, hate doing my hair and makeup; I have never had manicures or pedicures done. Does that make me less of a woman? or a bad person?
We are all different and we all like different things.
I don’t think children should be told what they can and cannot play with. If a girl wants to play with monster trucks and all kinds of cars, let her. And the same with boys, if they want to play with a doll, have a handbag and pretend to go shopping with their baby, why not?
Maybe if we encourage our boys to play with dolls and pretend to be dad’s we would raise better men, better fathers. Think about it, girls are forever playing house, being the moms taking care of everyone. You don’t really see boys playing dad, taking care of the kids. Sure they might play dad who fixes stuff in the house, but a dad is more than just a handyman.
I believe in letting my boys play with whatever they want and let their imaginations guide them. When I just had my second child, my first-born was 2. He saw me carrying his brother in a wrap. So the one-day he brought one of his stuffed bears (one of my old bears as a child) and he wanted to carry his bear the way I was carrying his brother, so I made him a wrap out of one of his receiving blankets.
We then had to go to the shops one day. We lived close to a small mall and we use to walk there. I placed his brother in the wrap and he also wanted to take his “baby” for a walk to the shop. So I made a wrap for his bear again, and off we went. Within 5 min of getting to the mall, while waiting at the Woolies bakery an elderly lady next to me was looking me up and down and said “Boy or girl?” To which I replied “Boy” she then gave me a look of utter disgusts and said, “why would you let him go to the shop like that?” I was so shocked I actually didn’t know what to say. I turned my son away from the lady and said: “He wanted to copy me and take his bear for a walk, do you have a problem with it?” To which she just made this weird dismissive snort sound and shook her head.
Then, about half an hour later in another shop, the teller said to my son “no boy, why are you playing with dolls and carrying it like a baby, you’re not a girl”
Seriously, what is it with some people. Keep your silly comments to yourself.
While my youngest was still a baby, my eldest would also copy me when breastfeeding. He would sit next to me, lift up his shirt and “feed” his bear. I don’t see why I should have stopped him or told him it is wrong. There is nothing wrong with it. I also don’t want him to think breastfeeding is wrong or disgusting.
I explained to him that only the mom’s do it, but so what if he copies me, so what if he fiddles with the breast pump. He was curious. He put nappies on his bears and dressed them in some of his brother’s clothes.
About 8 months after this incident we moved into our current house, I came across my Barbie and Barbie kitchen. My eldest was 3 at the time and he had such a ball playing with the kitchen even though everything was a horrible shade of Barbie pink. To be honest, I don’t think he even noticed the pink, he was having too much fun.
I let my boys walk around in my shoes. I have even painted my son’s nails and put clips in his hair when I am doing my hair, he is very inquisitive, so I show him how everything works and how you use them. His dad wasn’t too impressed when he saw him with clips in his hair and pink nails, hahaha. But he understands why I do it.
I think it is very important for kids to explore. This is how they learn. They learn more about the world around them and also what they like or don’t like. Today my boys are 5 and 7. They are still both very inquisitive. Two of their best friends is 2 sisters. When we have playdates at their house or go there for a braai. They have the best time with all the girl toys. I never hear “We can’t play because it is girl toys” or “but it is pink” No, they play together and have an absolute blast.
For my eldest’s 5th Birthday he wanted kitchen appliances. My mother-in-law, myself and 2 other friends bought him a nice blue set. Microwave, blenders, coffee machine, and all the trimmings, pots, plastic food, etc. That kitchen set still gets packed out on a regular basis to be played with when they pretend to have their own restaurant. The very next birthday he wanted a Masterchef party and said he wanted to be a chef one day.
Now is it just me, am I the one taking crazy pills? Or is it ok to let boys play with dolls and pink items?